How to build self-confidence and self-esteem?
Why is it important to build confidence and self-esteem? Well, building self-confidence and self esteem is crucial because it affects every area of your life. People who have high self-confidence believe in themselves and their ability. They stand in their beliefs. They have a strong mindset and tend to do or say the right thing. It is important for you to know how to build self confidence and self-esteem.
Why people don’t feel confident though?
It could be due to things that have happened to you as a child. It could be disappointing encounters in public. It could be something someone has said to you.
Perhaps it is having negative people, non-ambitious people around you.
You speak to yourself so badly so often that you’ve gotten accustomed to it. it forms into a habit.
The beautiful thing is no matter how conformed you think you are, your attitude and behavior can be adjusted.
However, you may be asking what steps you can take to build self confidence and self-esteem?
How to build self confidence and self-esteem
1. Stop comparing yourself to others negatively
Comparing yourself to others won’t do you any good. It brings about an insecure feeling. When you do this comparison, you tend to focus on the strongest point in the person’s life to what you consider low in your life.
Truly, that is only a piece of the picture. Sometimes if you know what happened behind closed doors.
The fact is you could be comparing yourself to something that doesn’t really exist or it wasn’t achieved legitimately. Instead of comparing yourself to other people, compare yourself to your own self.
What does this mean?
You should simply check your level of accomplishment. What have you done today that improves your life emotionally, physically, financially? You can’t ever be ideal. There has to be something to work on.
Monitor your successes. See how far you’ve come and what you’ve overcome.
Work on improving as a form of you. You are one of a kind. Be happy, be consistent in your actions as you learn how to build self confidence and self-esteem.
2. Identify areas to build confidence and self-esteem
How would you like to be confident? In what area are you struggling to be confident is an important question to answer to know as that will let you know where to put your focus.
Make a list of these in order of importance or in order of which you’re struggling with the most. difficulty. Saying that you’re not confident is too broad. You need to get down to the nitty-gritty.
How do you want to grow? Be very detailed in how you build self confidence and self-esteem so you can identify with the results as you achieve them.
Do you want to hone your singing abilities? Do you want to stand, talk to an audience without stuttering? Are you struggling with expressing yourself?
You need to be sure about yourself and what needs working on, work on it.
For example, I wasn’t confident in speaking in front of crowd and speaking, I wouldn’t be sure of what to say or how to say, or even if I did, I just thought that something would go wrong and as a result, I wasn’t confident. It was obvious.
I wanted to get over it so every chance I got in front of the mirror and practiced. I challenged myself to speak every chance I get in public; even though I was nervous until I improved. It still needs working because I haven’t yet mastered the art of public speaking but I’m doing much better.
Now, every opportunity you get to improve an area or become more confident, make use of it my friend.
Can you increase your skills in the areas you identify? For example, if you have a fear of public speaking, or want to go in a particular area, find a coach who can help as well. You could enroll in a course. Get some practice and ask for (constructive) feedback and work it, work it. No one will make the effort to build self confidence and self-esteem like you do.
3. Show sympathy towards yourself
Demonstrate empathy to yourself,
Try not to be so difficult on yourself, challenge any negative thoughts that seem to plague your mind. Don’t dwell on it because if you do, it grows into something further damaging.
Sometimes we are even harder on ourselves than we are on other people.
Negative thought are going to pop up in your mind. You’re going to play over in your mind- things that you’ve done and events that have happened, it’s natural, but don’t be too hard yourself.
Appreciate the process; you have to make mistakes first to get it right. Pretending that the problem isn’t there or that everything will be smooth sailing is only deceptive and steals time that you can’t regain. Have you made mistakes. It’s not the end of the world. Get up, brush yourself off and move on.
4. Quit looking for validation
Why have people become so obsessed with seeking approval from people? You need to stop care about what people have to say.
Living to get approval from people will make you miserable. You can’t live in peace. You’re constantly trying to change to please people. It’s too exhausting ( ooh gosh!). Today you’re this; tomorrow you’re that, the day after tomorrow you’re something else. Why?
Just to get validation from people.
Really?
What good does that do you? The time you take to try to fit in and seek approval, you could be living your own life for you. When you consider exploring how to build confidence and self-esteem, you need to make use of time.
Time lost can’t be regained. The time you take to please people you could be growing into what you really want, develop some gifts that you have. It’s okay to spend some time alone and discover something amazing about you.
You are uniquely made by God in his image and likeness.
You are astounding. Have enough confidence for yourself. You don’t need approval to build confidence and self-esteem.
In my very own case, I frequently sought approval from people after doing something.
If someone said I didn’t do something good I’d value it more than my own opinion, even if I did my best.
I asked what people thought and their answers would determine if I do it or not even it was something I really wanted to do.
Now is not the time to live to please people. It’s time to live your life.
You must believe in yourself and whatever you want to be. No one has to approve it. You need to value your own and stop being obsessed with people opinion of you.
5. Jump at it
A vital way to build confidence and self-esteem is to practice, practice, and practice until you get it right.
Public speaking used to make me really nervous, and for someone who wanted to be a motivational speaker, you’d think I would grab for this opportunity but I did the opposite, I would shy away from it.
There came a time I had to do a presentation. I would shake so hard even the paper started shaking. My words jumbled. I was noticeably uncomfortable and a wreck. I swore I would never do it again until I later realized that to overcome it. I just had to jump at every chance I get.
Even when I was nervous, I try to channel the negative feeling and nervousness to positive behavior and gestures. The more I did it, I eventually kept my composure, and I became better at it.
That’s what you should do my friend just do it, don’t overthink it.
6. Find a positive environment and optimistic people
It is important to know that as you seek to build confidence and self-esteem, you should shun negative people from your life.
A pessimistic attitude can be dangerous. Firstly, it’s contagious, no matter how you think you can be optimistic around negative people. That’s highly unlikely to happen. Have an optimistic mind. There is power in an optimistic attitude.
If you find yourself in a negative space respectively dismiss
yourself from them. It’s time you look out for yourself.
Try not to condemn or grumble. If you want to be confident surround yourself with like-minded people, confident behavior, goal-driven, highly motivated so that this attitude and behavior can have a spillover effect on you.
You need to take charge and be confident.
